Earth Speaks

If I were The Earth, I wouldn’t think much of humans – if in fact I gave any thought to them at all.

You can write an opera? Well, here’s a Tsunami! Oh, they were quaint back a thousand years ago and I’d snicker every time they drew me flat with three continents and Jerusalem at the centre.

But, I liked my ozone layer and these bastards blew fucking holes in it. I like that rain forest and I don’t need my oceans warmer and my ice caps smaller.

And some of them are tying to “save” ME. What a joke!! I am in no danger. Humans are messing themselves up – I don’t need an atmosphere to be a planet – Mars gets along just fine and there haven’t been any sentient life forms there since early 20th Century Sci-Fi.

I remember the dinosaurs – I liked them but a big rock hit me and they all died.

These idiots are extincting themselves but they can’t really harm me. Big rocks, now those scare me.

The Earth

Thomas